As I still attempt to find our perfect venue, and plan our wedding, I’m starting to get a big mix of opinions as to who should be doing what. Some brides to be are determined to take on the entire event single-handedly. Others wish their husbands or brides-to-be would take more of an active interest in the look and feel of the day. So what should the guys be doing, and what has to be left to you? Most importantly, how much are you willing to give to someone else to do?I think we’re all different. We all lead different lives and have different jobs. And each of our relationships is different too. Some guys are very arty and love the chance to flex their creative muscles designing the wedding. Others feel it’s a feminine event and should be left to the girls to deliver. I’m not sure a wedding should be about masculinity or femininity. For me, it’s about celebrating the love and commitment of a unique couple. It’s a good idea to do your research and see where couples have gine wring, and what thye would have done…learn from past families abdd friends weddings.
However, someone has to organise that celebration and turn it into a lifetime event! So where does that leave the couple? After all, there is so much to do, and it can be a very stressful few months trying to get it to come together. I think it’s nice when you both prepare the wedding together. But there are some things I just have to do alone!
The dress is one of them. I’m not sure I’m superstitious as such, but it is a nice tradition to uphold. Keeping the dress a secret until I’m walking up that aisle is quite important. It’s important to lots of brides. But that doesn’t mean I want to do the rounds of the wedding boutiques alone. Mothers of the Bride everywhere want to be involved. Sisters and best friends could tag along too. It’s a girl thing, I think. And I’m happy for it to stay that way!
I’m more than happy to go shopping for the groom’s suit, though! Or at least browse a few ideas. Some brides are keen for waistcoats to match the colours of the wedding theme. I think that’s a really nice idea too. It helps the groom look like he’s part of the event! The buttonholes are often booked by the bride when she orders her bouquet. Some Mothers of the Groom like to handle that one, though.
The wedding invitations are the hardest part of planning a wedding sometimes. It’s nice to use wedding invitation kits to cut down on the time it takes to prepare them. Writing, preparing and sending out the invitations is something the whole family can get involved with. The couple together can pore over the guest list, trying to cut it down to budget. Then the parents step in and remind you of a dozen people you’ve forgotten!
Catering is another decision the bride and groom could make together. If you’re both foodies, this one may take even longer to settle on than the guest list! I love sampling menus for the wedding menu. But it’s also a nice activity for you to do together as a couple. I’m not sure I would hand this job over to anyone. I would want some pretty awesome dishes for my wedding.
Decor for the wedding venue may be something you have to hand over on the day. Some venues only give you access to the room an hour before your event starts. There just isn’t time for the couple to take all that on. That doesn’t stop either of you making some decisions about colours and centrepieces, though. Having a couple of good friends to put everything place is essential if the venue won’t decorate for you.
As with any big event, you need people there to take care of your guests. Servers for food and drinks and someone to coordinate the movements of everybody is pretty important. You will also need a DJ to set up the music and make sure the First Dance goes smoothly. The First Dance track is usually a song that is special to you both as a couple. It’s important you decide on that together. As for the dancing, it’s always nice to get a lesson or two in together so you can enjoy it without feeling self-conscious.
I love weddings. Most of all, I love how it all comes together as if it was meant to be. It doesn’t really matter how many people are involved, or who takes on each task. Everyone is there to make sure it is the most beautiful day of your lives.